Dear Children

Dear Daughter,

Today’s world is scary. But you are never alone. For the mom of a daughter, the fear can be paralyzing. I have been very vocal about how we raise you, and how we will continue to raise you. You are strong and fierce and unique and empathetic. You are a self-proclaimed weirdo, and you embrace your quirkiness. In fact, you are wholly unapologetic. And you stand up for any person or animal in need. You will leave your own special mark on this world. Here are a few things I would like you to remember:

1. No is a complete sentence.
2. Your body is your own.
3. Say sorry only when you are in the wrong, not to appease others.
4. Set Boundaries.
5. It is okay to fight back.
6. Peer pressure is real, and it sucks.
7. Use us. Your dad and I have been around a while and we know more than you think.
8. Do not compare yourself to others.
9. I am your safe space always…your friends’ safe space too.
10. Not everyone is going to like you and you do not need to like everyone.
11. Always stand up for yourself, what you believe in and for those who cannot stand up for themselves.
12. Know how to recognize the truth.
13. Protect your digital privacy.
14. If you have to tiptoe around them, they aren’t for you.
15. Love is love.
16. Never stop learning.
17. Don’t be afraid to take risks.
18. Laugh a lot!
19. You will need your brother and he will need you.
20. You are enough.
21. I love you unconditionally.

Dear Son,

We see you too. We see you transforming, adapting. You’re struggling with feelings and changes we cannot see. It’s normal, a right of passage, but no one prepared us for how difficult it would be-to watch you pull away while needing us more than ever, to not be able to fix your world, to see you learn to fix things for yourself. No. This isn’t easy for any of us. You too are never alone. We are with you no matter what. Your silent strength and loyalty are noticed and admired by so many. You too will have a lasting impact on this world. As you mature, I want to instill the following lessons:

1. Be the example. Set the tone wherever you go.
2. You can always control two things- your attitude and your effort.
3. Set Boundaries, say No.
4. Peer pressure is real and it sucks.
5. You will need your sister and she will need you.
6. Females do not need you to save them, they need you to support them.
7. Use us. Your dad and I have been around a while and we know more than you think.
8. Do not compare yourself to others.
9. I am your safe space always…your friends’ safe space too.
10. Always have a plan B.
11. Express how you feel. Bottled up feelings can be detrimental to your mental health.
12. Learn how to cook for yourself, clean up your messes and do your own laundry.
13. Respect EVERYONE equally.
14. Value your education.
15. Stand up for yourself, your convictions and for those who cannot stand for themselves.
16. Look people in the eye, shake hands and give good hugs.
17. Learn how to fix things yourself. Being handy is a good thing.
18. Be cognizant of your digital footprint. The world does not need to know your business.
19. Have patience with others and yourself.
20. You are enough!
21. I love you unconditionally.